I just need 90 seconds

19 hours after delivery I had a little bit of a dilemma.  I had to pee and I was alone in the hospital room with C.  Craig had gone home to shower, our visitors left and I was soaking in the new feelings of motherhood while cuddling with my baby.  But I was also guzzling water and I had to pee.  And because I was paranoid that someone was about to sneak into my room and steal away my child (really folks I’ve watched A LOT of Lifetime TV) I needed to figure out how to keep my eyes on the baby while emptying my bladder. 

So, I gently laid her down, wheeled the bassinet across the room and positioned it so that I could see her while I used the bathroom.  I did my thing as quickly as possible (considering the process included a peri bottle, tucks, Dermoplast spray, mammoth pads and traumatized lady bits) and scooped up my child.  She didn’t move the entire time.  My absence was not missed. 

Four months later, she notices when I’m not in the room.  Whether I’ve been holding or playing with her or whether she’s been hanging out in her exercauser, her little eyes follow me as I leave the room.  For the first 20 seconds that I’m out of her sight she whines, then she starts to fuss.  By the time I’m done, it’s a full-on yell.  So, now, using the bathroom includes placing her in the bouncy seat on the floor of the bathroom or on a blanket outside the door and singing or narrating my activities while I do my thing. 

My mom tells a story about how my little brother, as a toddler, once slid his hand under the bathroom door, waved his fingers and said, “MOMMIEEEEE…  can you see me?” 

So, my question, internet, is:  Can a mother really not get 1.5 minutes to pee?


2 Responses

  1. I love your fears in the hospital….I had the same fears, either me or my husband had to be with the baby, afterall she was a cutie and someone might want to snatch her (read irrational new mom).

  2. Unfortunately the answer is no!! My little guy is almost 4 and I have yet to pee in peace. In fact, now that HE is potty trained, I’ll be sitting there mid-pee and he runs in and tells me that HE has to go, so I have to frantically finish before he pees his pants.

    LOVE your blog!

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