Don’t Be Fooled

Don’t let those big eyes pull you in or the loving embrace of the doll fool you.  She looks all sweet and innocent here.  All loving and gentle.  All ” OH  MY GAWD what a sweet baby, I just want to reach into the computer screen and scoop her up.” And she is a sweet, sweet child with her doll and her father.  But with me…. no such luck. 

When I feed her, I get clawed in the face.  When I change her diaper, my hair gets pulled.  She scratches, she pinches, she tears earrings out of my ears and she tries to pick my nose. (In the interest of full disclosure I’m constantly picking hers too, so we’ll call that one even. )  Twice this week I’ve had to change clothes ten minutes before leaving for work thanks to diaper blowouts.    Have you ever tried to bath a baby in heels and a dress?  Not easy and usually ends in only a slightly better disaster than in which it began. 

It’s a good thing that this little girl doesn’t pack much heat behind her punches or I’d have some explaining to do!  So, someone tell me, when can I expect my kid to stop trying to kick my ass?


One Response

  1. I stumbled across your blog today on Top Baby Blogs. I follow two other blogs (Dear Baby and Twice Blessed) and was looking for additional humorous reading material. I’m a new mom as well (my peanut is 5 weeks old) and trying to keep my sanity and find advice via other women’s blogs.

    My poor husband just got home, I shoved the baby in his arms (he too has the magic touch to make her go to sleep – and of course, for 6 hours straight on his “night shift”), and started reading. He’s probably ready to pull the plug on the lap top. I keep interrupting his Laker watching to read him excerpts of your blog. He doesn’t seem to find the amusement like I do.

    Tomorrow, when I’m bored out of my mind I’m going to go back and read this blog from the beginning. It has made my week.

    Thank you for providing a smile through new mommy blues and a working-women’s boredom of staying home with a newborn:)

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